


Marking You

by sarumikoto



Series: Haikyuu domestic scenarios that went wrong [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Attempt at Humor, Author Is Sleep Deprived, But not in a kinky way i swear, Crack, Established Relationship, M/M, Pee, kuroshou
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:15:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27034036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarumikoto/pseuds/sarumikoto
Summary: Daishou was drunk and Kuroo just wanted to help his boyfriend, but he wasn't ready for what happened.
Relationships: Daishou Suguru/Kuroo Tetsurou
Series: Haikyuu domestic scenarios that went wrong [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1973023
Kudos: 33





	Marking You

**Author's Note:**

> tw: PISS

Kuroo couldn’t believe what was happening. 

He went on a drinking night with Akaashi and Bokuto, this one being a very special night since he was finally going to introduce Daishou as his boyfriend. It wasn't as if they didn't know what was going on between the pair, the constant fighting outside the court where just an epilogue of something that everyone knew how would end up.

Well, everyone but Kuroo and Daishou apparently. 

But the night went smoothly. They talked a lot, bringing back memories from high school and even called Kenma to tell the news - the younger tried to sound surprised, but only two words were necessary to Kuroo realize that Kenma already knew what was going on. They danced together and Daishou tried to escape, but his boyfriend - gosh, they were boyfriends now! - knew damn well how to move his hips and he couldn’t miss something like that. And well, they drank. A lot.

It was past 3 a.m when Akaashi shoved Bokuto inside a taxi, waving to the pair before getting literally pulled inside the car by Bokuto. Kuroo laughed, holding his phone while waiting for the uber drive to arrive. He was happy. His friends and his boyfriend were getting along well and he couldn’t wait to get home and spent some time alone with Suguru.

But Daishou, on the other hand, was out of his mind. He was sitting on the pavement, almost dozing off feeling his head heavy and spinning. His vision was blurry and if it wasn't for grabbing his arm when the shorter one tried to get up, he was going to fall on his ass.

“Tetsu, I need to pee.” His voice was hoarse, kinda broken for using too much. Kuroo spent a whole minute looking at his boyfriend, trying to understand what he said.

“You said you need to pee? Like, right now? There’s no bathroom here, can’t you wait? The driver is coming.” 

Suguru shook his head in denial, regretting the action immediately when he felt his stomach churn.

“Nooo, my bladder hurts. I’m going to pee on my pants, Tetsu. Do you want to see me peeing on my pants?” He said dramatically and Tetsuro had to hold his laugh.

“Babe, I would die to see you peeing on your pants…” Suguru made a face and the brunette laughed. The high school Kuroo would really, really die to see something like that, but he couldn’t let this happen to Suguru right now. Dating your ex-enemy was hard. “You’ll have to pee on the alley, then. I’ll take you there, but please do it fast, the driver is coming.”

“Okay, I get it.” Daishou was impatient. He just needed to pee, but he was starting to think Kuroo was having fun seeing him in this situation. 

On the alley, Kuroo leaned against the wall covering Daishou from anyone who could pass on the street. He knew it was wrong and gross, but the security of the club didn’t allow going back inside once you’re out and there wasn’t any public bathroom near the club. 

“I hope no one see us here, this is so bad I’m feeling guilty.” The brunette said, looking at his phone, the driver was closer right now. “Suguru, we have to go.”

“Wait, wait! I’m almost done…” 

“Damn, how much pee can you keep? You’re not even that tall, your bladder can’t be this big.” He provoked, laughing when he listened to Daishou’s gasp.

“Listen here you little shit, I’m-” Daishou turned around to see his boyfriend, but on his drunkenness he forgot for a second that he was still peeing.  
And he kept peeing.  
On Kuroo’s leg.

“Daishou, what the fuck? Are you a fucking hose? You’re peeing on me!” He screamed, drawing the attention of a few people that were passing by. Only then Daishou startled, seeming to understand what was happening and tucked himself in the pants again, looking at Kuroo like he was a ghost.

“Oh my God… I’m so sorry.” Kuroo was livid. Daishou stared at his boyfriend’s pants, a wet spot on his left leg and he couldn’t hold a laugh. The brunette gazed at him with a frown.

“You pee on me and now you’re laughing?”

“I’m sorry, but this feels like I’m marking you as my territory.” Daishou explained between laughs and Kuroo stayed quiet. Piss on his leg. 

He was going to tell Daishou to fuck himself when the loud sound of a horn could be heard. Kuroo looked at his phone and saw the messages of the uber driver, rolling his eyes.

“We’re going to discuss your piss kink when you’re sober… Now come on, we need to go home, I can smell your pee on me.”

{~}

Daishou’s head was buried between his arms, a mug of hot coffee placed in front of him. He wasn’t going to believe a thing Kuroo was saying, that couldn’t be true. He would never pee on the street, first of all. And he would never pee on Kuroo, he didn’t have a piss kink, for fucks sake! But now Kuroo was laughing and he would never let this story die, no. He was going to make Daishou regret drinking so much that night!

“You’re lying, I would never do that…” He stayed with his head pressed against the cold glass of the table, it was helping with the headache he was dealing with. Kuroo shrugged.

“You want me to rub my pants on your face? I want to feel the way you felt yesterday, you said something like, hmm, oh! I want to mark you as my territory too!” Suguru groaned, he was feeling so embarrassed. At least Bokuto and Akaashi were gone at that time. 

“Someone put something on my drinks, I never did something like that!” Kuroo rolled his eyes, placing his hand on Suguru’s hair, caressing his stupid boyfriend.

“Yeah, they put too much alcohol on it.”

**Author's Note:**

> please dont pee on the streets!!!!!!!


End file.
